A Question You Must Answer

“What do you seek?”

If you’re anything like me, you cringe when you’re asked this question. I never know how to answer. What do I seek? Normally, I pretend it’s a rhetorical question.

But it’s a gnawing question, so I needed to do a little digging. The definition of the verb “seek” is “to go in search of: to try to acquire or gain: to aim at.” Am I truly seeking something, and searching for something in my daily life? What is it that I genuinely want and desire? If I examine my goals and my dreams, what is it I am aiming for? And if I answered that question honestly, would I be proud of my answer?

As challenging as it may be, this seems a question which we must answer. In fact, this question stands at the very heart of what it means to be a Christian, a follower of Christ. When Jesus calls His first disciples, these are the initial words of the call:

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“The next day again John was standing with two of his disciples, and he looked at Jesus as he walked, and said, ‘Behold, the Lamb of God!’ The two disciples heard him say this, and they followed Jesus. Jesus turned, and saw them following, and said to them, ‘What do you seek?’ And they said to Him, ‘Rabbi, where are You staying?’ He said to them, ‘Come and see.’” – John 1:35-39

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This is one of my favorite passages in the Bible. Every time I read it, I never fail to laugh. I can’t help finding it humorous that the disciples answer Jesus’s question with another question! “Rabbi, where are You staying?” And yet, I believe that their response holds the key as to why we find the question “What do you seek?” so difficult to answer.

“What do you seek?... Rabbi, where are You staying?”

Presumably, there are many things the disciples wanted in life. For a few, they probably wanted good health, happiness, peace in their nation, a steady income, even fish. But, when faced with Jesus’s question, they are at a loss for an answer. This is their first interaction with Jesus. Suddenly, they are introduced to someone unlike anyone they’ve ever met before – someone who changes everything. He asks them,“What do you seek?” They respond, “Rabbi, where are You staying?” Without being able to put it into words, the disciples stumble to a groundbreaking conclusion. By answering Jesus’s question with a question, they truly answer what it is they seek. “Rabbi, where are You staying?” Rabbi, You. What do I seek? YOU.

The truth is, there are so many different things I have searched for and aimed at in my life. On a daily basis, I seek after peace, happiness, fulfillment, and meaning. Sometimes I’ve thought I would find that in popularity. Other times I thought it could be found in a job or a status. Throughout stages of our life, different things appear to hold the key to our so-wanted happiness - a person, a relationship, money, power, pleasure, and fame can fill us. My current happiness façade is that of accomplishment or success. If I just accomplish this one more brilliant task, then, I will be happy, right? And yet, as we all know, even if we achieved and obtained all of these things, we would always be left still seeking. We will always be left hungry. We will find another thing to aim at, and won’t stop until we reach it, just to find the same disappointment on the other side.

So, what do we seek? We must come to the same conclusion as the disciples. “Rabbi, where are You staying?” Where are You, Jesus, going to be? Where You are, I want to be. You are what I want. You are what my heart truly seeks.

All else but Jesus fails to satisfy. The Catechism of the Catholic Church says: “The desire for God is written in the human heart because man is created by God and for God... Only in God will he find the truth and happiness he never stops searching for.” – CCC 27. In his book “Resisting Happiness,” author Matthew Kelly rephrases this:

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“Nothing on earth can satisfy your desire for happiness. The reason is very simple: You have a God-size hole. You cannot fill it with things, money, status, power, sex, drugs, alcohol, other people, experiences, or accomplishments. Only God can fill the hole.”

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Another brilliant man, St. John Paul II once said, “it is Jesus that you seek when you dream of happiness.” What do we seek? Maybe now the answer is more apparent. The answer is Jesus.

So why do we seek it elsewhere? Why do we search for fulfillment in things which we know will never satisfy? Why do we try to cram things into our God-size hole, and get frustrated when they don’t fit? It doesn’t have to be that way. When Jesus asked the question, “What do you seek?” the disciples were either too awkward, confused, or embarrassed to answer straight up. They did not completely understand how this one man, this stranger to them, was suddenly everything they wanted in life. We don’t have to understand either. But what we do know, is we want to be where He is. “Rabbi, where are You staying?”

Jesus understands the disciples. He doesn’t get frustrated when they answer His question with a question. Rather, I can imagine He smiled at them. And He invites them to where He is staying. He invites them to follow Him. He invites them to receive what they truly seek.

He is asking us the same question today. “What do you seek?” Let’s not leave it unanswered. We seek Him. Let’s receive the gift He offers.

“Come and see.”

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