My New Approach to Advent

Sometimes, I struggle to separate my childish views of events with my supposedly now mature, educated vision. 

This sometimes happens with our current liturgical season: Advent.

I’d like to think of Advent as what it truly is. Advent is a beautiful season of the Church, where we simultaneously prepare and expectantly await the celebration of Jesus’s nativity at Christmas, and His second coming at the end of time. We are given this season to cultivate in our hearts an appreciation, joy, and hope in our Emmanuel, our God with us. 

But, sometimes I hear “Advent,” and the first thing I think of? Christmas is coming! Presents! Decorating! New music! Oh, but, boo, I also have to give something up? That's no fun!

It’s true, part of the preparation in our hearts for Christ’s coming includes making penance for our sins. Some people even describe Advent as a “mini Lent.” We see this penitential aspect portrayed through the priest wearing purple liturgical vestments, we omit the Gloria at Mass, most parishes hold an extra Reconciliation service, and children tearfully restrain from sweets in anticipation of the mother-load of Christmas cookies they’re looking forward to consuming. At least, that was definitely me as a child. 

But now, as an adult, I have two times been presented this Advent season while I am deep in another season of life: postpartum. Having had two babies in November, I feel like I am getting used to sleepily showing up to Mass after Thanksgiving, blearily glancing at the bulletin to be reminded, “Holy cow, it’s the first Sunday of Advent already?! Where has the time flown?”

And then there’s the dreaded, albeit well-intentioned question, “what are you doing for Advent?” I know there are so many good resources, studies, books, devotionals, and practices out there, but now for the second time I’m facing this season practically unaware what day of the week it is most days, trying to grab catnaps anywhere I can, and working a part time job trying to stay hydrated so my body can feed a very hungry and thirsty newborn. 

I can’t add anything else on for Advent. I’m in the trenches as is. 

But then I feel so guilty, because shouldn’t I be doing more? Should I have joined that small group at Church? Should I have started that devotional/podcast/you name it good content that offers guided reflections of the Advent season? Shoot, we are already three days in and I’ve already botched a perfect streak at giving up sweets or social media or whatever the other thing was that so-and-so was giving up and looked so holy doing. 

Oh, what a lie, that lie that I need to be doing more. 

But this Advent, the Lord has convicted me, that what I am doing is exactly what He wants. 

I think it was actually at exactly 3:14 AM a few days into Advent, when I was biting back tears of frustration and exhaustion with a little one that only seemed to be calm when I was holding him and nursing him, that He convicted me. In the quiet whir of the double white noise machines that rule our upstairs at night, a familiar verse came to mind, but one that I had never meditated on in this context. 

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“I appeal to you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship.” - Romans 12:1

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And even though the baby continued to cluster-feed through the night, something deep inside me rested that night. Because the Lord had gently reminded me that sometimes, the duties of your season/state in life, are exactly the penance that He is asking of us. In that moment, I could quite literally view my body, in its exhaustion and postpartum discomfort and transition,  as a “living sacrifice.”

Even when I feel incapable of embracing this Advent season fully, because of the demands that are present in my day to day, if I unite those demands to Him then I am embracing the season. And that is worship.

Maybe you feel you have space to do something additional this Advent, and if that’s you, by all means go for it. Praise God that the season you’re in allows for that. But if you feel like you’re doing all you can already, it’s ok. God who has called you to your state in life has also called you to the everyday tasks of that state in life, and holiness can be found deeply in uniting those daily sacrifices to Him and doing them out of love for His glory. And that goes for moms, dads, grandmas, grandpas, students, workers, you name it. 

Your day to day holds immense importance and power. Maybe you’re not offering up sweets, but building patience and self-control and charity by interacting with your annoying co-worker, is probably offering you a greater path toward virtue and sanctity. So copy and paste into that sentence whatever it is that is a challenge or cross for you right now. Let it be a living sacrifice.

And let’s embrace this Advent together.